"I'm sorry Emma I can't edit your report, I'm really busy, but I promise I'll do the next two reports for you to make up for it."
"I have to help; saying no would be rude and besides, I might want help from them sometime in the future."
"People will see me differently if I stop being helpful."
Any of these statements sound familiar?
Unassertiveness can manifest in many different ways, as you can see above, and the excuses we come up with to justify our actions are just as varied.
What one needs to understand about assertiveness is that it's not about changing who you are as a person, or about being any less helpful, but rather about knowing what you want and need and being confident enough to have your voice heard.
Assertive behaviour is being able to ask for what you need from others and being able to say no when you are unable to help. It is being able to communicate without being aggressive or bossy, even when our rights are being infringed upon.
How assertive or unassertive are you? Check out our assertive vs. aggression checklist here.
Staff Training presents Assertiveness Training nationwide. Find out more here.